Phoenix, Arizona -- Dan Ryan is looking into his handy dandy recording device. Over his shoulder is the CWF World Championship belt. He gives it a light tap and a shocked expression comes across his face.
Oh my, what is this?? Some sort of shiny new shoulder ornament? Wait -- wait just a second...
Ryan leans in, knowingly.
Did I actually do what I said I was gonna do and WIN the World Championship at CONFLICTION?? Is that what happened??
Ryan leans back, just flabbergasted.
I just... I just don't know what to say. I'm stunned. Ataxia? What happened man? How could this be? Back when we had our first match, you said I was a waste of your time. I didn't belong. I'm not anywhere near your level. So, what just happened? HOW did it happened? Wait... wait a second. Ataxia, are you on crack? You're on crack, right? Okay okay, I understand. You don't know what you're saying. Logic isn't your forte'. I guess we all knew that. You hear voices in your head. They counsel you. They understand. But man -- it seems the voices LIED to you, man. They LIED. How can you forgive them? The voices... they have FORSAKEN you. Get it?? FORSAKEN..... you.
And Duce. The Duce was supposed to be loose. You had the juice. There was a moose. Perhaps a goose. Look man, no excuse. I get it now, yes. It's Duce because you're named after your dad, and because spelling Deuce properly ain't street enough. I've got that straight. But you know, most sequels suck. You do know that, right? Maybe you know now. Maybe you're starting to get it. Maybe it started to sink in when I held my belt up high over my head with my boot on your face. That had to be embarrassing. Do they think less of you where you come from when you end your night with one cheek on the concrete and the other up against a man's boots?
I mean, I'm clearly not street, so I don't know. You'll have to teach me the ways of the Duce. But it can't be good right? No, it can't be good AT ALL.
And my dear dear friend....uhhhhh THE SHADOW!
Weird organ music plays as Ryan looks around all mysterious like then ends abruptly.
Or perhaps I should say -- former CWF World Champion -- uhhhh THE SHADOW!
That weird organ music again. And .... it's gone again.
You know -- I know before our match I made some comments about the turmoil you'd been feeling about whether or not you deserved the championship after the way you won it. Loki didn't exactly win it in an honorable way, and EM-JAY-EFF seemingly kinda got screwed and I know how much that fucked with your head. I made fun of that a little bit. I said.... basically that you were a sap. A shadowy and mysterious sap to be sure, but a sap nonetheless. And I have to say, looking back on what I said -- I was right. You are a sap. I didn't pin you, I know -- but I feel fantastic right now. And, I think I solved your dilemma for you.
You 100% did not deserve the World Championship. It seems you'd been carrying it around for me until I showed up.
Que sera sera, mon Sha-DOE
Ryan leans back comfortably, adjusting the belt still across his shoulder.
I know I'm keeping this short and sweet, but I have the sneaking suspicion you will be putting something out shortly that will drone on and on and on, with enough druids and enough candles to put Yankee Candle out of business forever. I don't really wanna steal your thunder.
So good luck to you, Mr. Shadow. Until we meet in that ring, keep your flames a flick'rin, your eye shadow a dark'nin, your prop lightnin' lightenin', and your long winded soliliquoys soliliquoy....... -in'
Ryan flashes a cheesy grin and a thumbs up.