Editor's Note of Editing: Mia Rayne, one can assume has a couple different personalities inside her head. The two that we know of thus far, are Mia and Peyton. Now when you read Mia's voice and thoughts, they will be just in BOLD. When you read Peyton, she will always be in ITALICS. Awesome. Happy to get that resolved. Now without further adieu, I give you this week's rendition of Mia Rayne Theater...
It had been a hectic day, well, more like days with an emphasis on the “ess” for our young heroine Mia Rayne. Sure, she had met someone that she had watched compete when she was just a wee young lass, picturing herself holding some form of a title high above her head as she looks down at her fallen opponent.
I was so naive...
She takes a couple puffs off of her little tentacle bowl as she turns up the volume on her phone, one of her favorite playlists playing as gently as it can, with genres varying from classic rock all the way to death metal. Punk to garage. Pop to instrumental. But no country. Lord no country. She continues to hold her breath and then lets it out with a sigh as she looks over the city of Providence from her little hidey hole on top of the hotel roof. Sure, technically speaking she wasn't allowed up there but...
I'm a celebrity now. Status and privileges and what not...
She walks with her hands deep in her baggy hoodie, hugging herself tightly as she heads to her "spot." It had everything she could ask for minus a snack bar. It had a seat, an empty milk crate to put her weary feet up on, and it faced the setting sun, a perfect view to sit and get lost in. As the sun set over one of Rhode Island's biggest cities, Mia watches the sun turn from the harsh yellow that pissed her off to no end throughout the day unless it was hiding it's punk ass bitch face behind a cloud...
Sorry. Mia doesn't like the really bright sun. She prefers shade. Anyways...
The sky turned into her favorite shade of blue and as she slowly sinks into a sense of relaxation she hasn't felt since before Paradise, she gets lost in her thoughts...
What a roller coaster. It goes up with Paradise, a savage win over a worthy adversary, but a win nonetheless. It goes down with the fall of Impakt, no pun intended. I still should have helped him. I should have...
But no. Ataxia was my priority at the time right? I mean, I do love him, I FEEL for him, I literally feel everything for him, he is now a part of me and I don't know much about him do I? Granted, it will come in time, I can't push him for information, I don't want to lose him. I want to prove to him that I'm worthy, that I am good girlfriend material?
Mia scrowls at nothing and takes another puff. This was going to get interesting as her gaze darts to her bag beside her. A small clutch big enough for...
Ah! Peyton! I was wondering when you were going to show up again. How has the view been from where you have been? Hope I've made you PRouD!
Hardly. Concentrating on your own selfish desires while someone you claim is one of your heroes gets thrashed? That's... That's not cool, but I can kind of understand why you got Ataxia out of there too.
Mia closes her eyes and her gaze once again flitters to her clutch that seems to be getting closer to her the more she tries to ignore it. She takes another puff off of her bowl and continues to watch her sunset with her feet up.
Say what you want. You know just as well as I do Princess PeyPey that I can't be in two places at once, and even if I had gone back, what would have happened? Numbers games suck donkey balls and you have to get SUPER lucky to get out of one alive.
You know why I made sure Ataxia was ok. He's my twisted idea of a Prince Charming. A love that neither of us have EVER felt before and don't you dare regret it either Pey. That was something you've CRAVED forever and a day. Guess what? It's here and it loves us for who we are. Of course I'm going to make sure he's ok and do everything in my power to make sure I prove that I'm worthy to even be considered to be good enough...
Mia calmly puts her bowl in her lap and tenses up, every muscle in her body from her toes to her finger tips, all the way up through her hair. She could feel it all in her teeth even, and let's just say that that is a pain best left to people who know how to handle it. Mia may not want to handle it, but she can because she's used to it.
But just like any overwound rubber band, Mia too unwinds. The tension in her explodes out and she unleashes a flurry of blows against the sides of her temple in rapid succession. One after the other. If anyone had been around to see it, they would say it wouldn't have lasted for more than a couple seconds. To Mia? It lasted an eternity.
Just like always though and just as suddenly as it starts, it stops. The fists stop their assault against her head and she calmly picks up her bowl and lighter from where she had set them prior. Smiling slightly to herself she helps herself to another puff and deeply inhales, holding it in for several moments, and blowing out the smoke into the cool night air.
The sky, now a deep lavender continued to go through its routine as Mia continued her conversation with herself, but not herself...
Yes. We're both aware that we're not good enough, but what is that cliche that everyone always tells us?
Ah yes. The ol' "fake it till you make it" narrative.
How often have we come "home" after a long day inside our own head, "faking it till we made it..." Home, only to sit there and stare into the abyss? We could have done so much more so many times but when push comes to shove, when it comes down to the right time to pull any kind of trigger that might upset someone... Can we do it without facing major repercussions?
This makes Mia pause, not that she was doing much anyways. However, once again if there were someone there to observe her, they would be able to tell that her gaze became a bit more alert and a bit less glazed. It was almost as if a cat had come out from a dead sleep to try and hunt a bug that had the audacity to land on its nose. Ya know, provided that the cat woke up on contact. We all know how cats operate, they're dicks. But fluffy ones, so they can't be faulted too much.
I fucking love fluffy cats...
She takes another puff on her tentacle and once again zones out on the sun setting
Why do you think I've been hiding for so long though? Since I found out that I have to be across the ring from Ataxia this week? I fucking KNOW The Oreo Cookie gang had something to do with this. Tax and I already plan on confronting Rish about this. Ataxia wasn't informed and he's the boss after all...
Is this what it feels like to have a weakness? Like...
My relationship is being held against me and Ataxia. It's like they want to try to use the fact that we found each other against us and I WARNED Elisha not to mess with us. I fucking warned him that he was already on thin ice. Fucker.
You shouldn't have added fuel to that fire though. That's why this is happening. Shadow has to team with a guy that you're not even sure if he's dead or alive, Dorian is facing off against a champion that beat your pick for winning at Paradise. What is it going to take to open your eyes Mia? YOU are the cause of so much grief on so many people.
You're a burden.
Go fuck yourself Pey. There's a reason I took over. I know what I am and I know the damage I cause, but there has to be some good in all of this right? Shadow and I helped The Forsaken become a household name when we rocked through the tag team division and became number one contenders in the span of a couple weeks. I was a part of that I helped.
And while I don't have too much experience with Dorian, have you SEEN his manager?! She's fecking adorable! Something tells me that as big and as strong and as dangerous as that dude is... He's a big teddy bear to those he cares for. And I like to have those in my life. They're good for protection and ya know... I just feel like he's good to have around and have my back.
It's a charming name isn't it PePe? He's everything that I could have ever hoped for in a man and in all honesty, I always thought I was a shallow bitch, judging people based on looks. Ataxia hooked me though and he makes me feel complete. He doesn't take away my insanity, he understands it and helps it become what it is intended to be. It's meant to be embraced and understood.
Bury deep enough and the truth is usually revealed under the muck and grime. Grim? Grime.
But he gets it because he's going through or WENT through everything that makes me all wonky doodle. He knows and he embraced it. There are things in this world that aren't meant to be understood.
Why rhetorical questions exist.
The sanity of insanity. I don't claim to understand it myself, but I embrace it and it allows me to see that Elisha is striking out like that of a cornered mouse. So let him think that he's the cat that has all the cards.
Never count out the jester, they're typically WylD...
Do you honestly think that putting a random "y" in words, they make them more intimidating? First you butcher a classic video game character's name and now you make a joker's wild reference that isn't even correct.
You personicate the word "bad" in every sense. You talk big, but you have...
Yo bitch! Didn't your mama...Wait, that won't work because technically our mamas are the same. Instead I'll just say shut your bitching bitch hole before I put you in a box so far back in the corners of this space you call a brain, we'll be decades in the future before you even SEE a sight such as this again.
It was true. This particular night the sun is setting just over the horizon, the water stretching out to meet it. Random aquatic birds fly out across the water, dotting the sky like a badly animated connect the dots puzzle. The colors were absolutely...Stunning and breathtaking. It's difficult to describe how deep the lavender is turning, how Mia could see where it was still a pretty lavender and progressed all the way to a deep purple. The sun still poked out above the horizon slightly, now a flaming red, radiating an aura that contrasted the cooler colors of the sky.
Mia watches the colors fight for control of the sky, knowing that the darker colors were soon going to take over and her time was coming in more ways than one. Another flick of her lighter, another puff, another inhale...
And another exhale. She smiles and loses herself interest in the world around her and concentrating on nature's beauty.
I've stayed away from The Forsaken. I don't want to cause any more issues. Maybe I added fuel to a fire, but this fire was already going when I got here. I'm just throwing my weight behind the right side.
There isn't a question and you know that just like I do PeePee. I digress though. You got me off on a tangent and I was going to tell you about names. They have power you know...
I never liked Oreo cookies as a kid. My brother used to request specific, white fudge covered Oreo cookies for Christmas every year. And like clockwork, he would get them. I tried them on multiple occasions and all I remember is that they were super sweet.
Just because something sounds good doesn't mean that it is.
Just because a name sounds imposing, doesn't mean it is. Names have power, but they have a power that can be controlled and harnessed. Call someone by the name they want to be called by and they think that you respect them enough to maintain that formality. You want to get under their skin?
Call them everything but their name.
Granted one employs this strategy with the belief that it will be fired right back, which is fine. I'm sure between the two of us, we can handle whatever they want to throw.
Especially since I give it right back several times over.
Mia takes another puff off her bowl and makes a face as she sticks her tongue out.
Her voice sounds weird, even for her.
Don't talk out loud dumb ass. Now since you're in hiding, you may as well do it now and get it over with. You know you'll just do it eventually anyways and the longer you wait, the worse it becomes.
Mia's gaze locks on the quickly setting sun as she reaches down, almost mechanically and fishes around in her clutch for a few moments before pulling out the fork that she acquired from Mr. Dane. Or "Mistah" Dane.
He probably thought that was so stupid. Weird. Like I don't belong in his league. Why did I have to call him "Mistah?" Why couldn't I have just call him "mister" like any regular person?
She scratches her head with the fork and slowly traces it down her left shoulder, allowing it to catch on one of several long sleeves she wears throughout the day. Continuing down the path on her arm, the fork takes the sleeve with it, revealing several fresh and several more semi fresh cuts up and down Mia's forearm. She winces as the fork trails some of the cuts but continues until the sleeve is down around her wrist. She inspects her arm closely, her gaze not revealing much.
Sometimes she looks at the arm with such sadness, such that angels have wept with her.
Sometimes it's rage that would make Ares himself quake.
And sometimes it is just looks of curiosity, an explorer finding a new sample to examine.
This time though was familiar yet different than any of those.
This time she felt the plunge of the icy numbness that she gets every time she does this. She tests the fork gingerly on her skin, forcing the tines into her skin. She looks on in calm detachment.
Unsatisfied though, she puts the fork back into its home and instead takes out a fresh razor blade from its package.
As the sun sets on Providence, Rhode Island Mia Rayne ensures that while no one will ever forget her name, no one will ever forget her presence either.
The thing of it is, there is almost always the proverbial "calm before the storm." Mia has felt it for a while now, bubbling up, an anger that has absorbed so much negative emotion that Mia has sucked in throughout the years and never allowed to escape; one that she was quite sure that if she did allow its departure from her inner being, nothing short of a nuclear holocaust would follow.
She was sure of all of this as she carves line after line after bloody fucking line into her arm. First the cuts are long and methodical, but they quickly become quick and frantic, almost frenzied.
And then it stops. She looks down at her arm, now fully covered in blood. She looks at the pool that is beneath her. She looks at the word that is now carved, etched onto her skin.
Bloody, red. But as she grabs her nearby towel she starts to laugh as she sees the blood being absorbed by the the comically white fabric. She laughs as she wraps the towel tightly around her arm to try and have her cuts to at least stop bleeding. Slinging her clutch over her opposite shouder, she cradles her left arm and proceeds to make her way back down the familiar path to her hotel room that Shadow procured for her. While she didn't accept any invites for social gatherings, she still wanted to remain close. Sneaking quietly into her room, she slips into a nice hot shower to ease her troubled mind...
As Mia steps out of the shower she senses a familiar presence, one she's used to at this point.
"I had a feeling I'd see you. I'd say let me slip into something more comfortable but..."
She finishes wrapping her hair in a towel and gestures to the towel wrapped around her, spinning in a slow circle as if modeling it off for Ataxia.
"I have a plan."
His voice always calmed her. Always. She smiles at him and sits down on his lap, giving him a long and hard kiss.
"So do I, My Love. But for tonight the only plan I want is one that involves falling asleep in your arms."
Effortlessly Ataxia picks up Mia, towels and all, but maybe it just so happens to slip open enough that one could see Mia's soft skin underneath; and carries her over to the over sized bed. He plops her down and crawls behind her, wrapping her up nice and tight as she takes her hair down and sighs in contentment, allowing herself to be swallowed by his comfort.
This story could go on, but we all know how it ends...