It’s not been a good few weeks for me, it seems that no matter how hard I try that I’ve just hit this sort of brick wall that I can’t seem to break through. I was hoping that aligning with Nathan Paradine would be a bit of a jumpstart getting me back on track. However it hadn’t seemed to be that effective. If we were being honest with ourselves we most likely only triumphed over Jimmy and Dorian because they had already went to war with one another. Sense that one victory though I’ve fallen to Autumn Raven, Shadow, and KC3 with Silas. That’s just depressing if I’m being honest with myself. Shadow I could accept, after all it was for the world title, which is normally when I shine but evidently not bright enough this time around. However the lost to Raven stung, for those who don’t recall, she was my first match here in the CWF, one that I won quite convincingly although she put up a hell of a fight. Then although it didn’t go into the record books as a lost due to Crimson and Kendo’s interference, I was already defeated by KC3. That knee hit me right on the button and it was lights out. Paradine of course would of bailed me out but concerning just myself, it was over. I don’t think I’d of been much use to him for the rest of that match. You know I was thinking as things spiraled out of control with Jimmy that he was the weak link. However, maybe I was wrong.
I find myself sitting in my locker room. I can hear the crowd getting prepared for Warfare tonight, where they will witness myself and Paradine go to war with Kendo and Crimson Ghost. Not going to lie, I’m not familiar with either of them. Mainly because I’ve been so wrapped up in my own world I’ve not paid alot of attention to what is going on outside of my own bubble. However from the bit of film I’ve had a chance to look at in the last week they both look rather formidable. It’s certainly going to be a test of skill for both myself and Nathan. A task that I don’t know if we’re honestly up to. Maybe it’s time for the old guard to step down and let the new take over? I mean we’ve had a good run over the years. I’ve been doing this off and on for at least a decade now, and Paradine even longer. It seems like a lifetime ago that we were staring in the sanctioned violence organization, hence the name sake of our team. Maybe it was a lifetime ago, as I certainly am nowhere near the same person I was before. Sure I put on the same bravado and pompous nature with my smirk. However outside the ring I couldn’t be more different if I tried. Gone are the days of conning people out of their money and doing dirty business dealings with Christopher St. James. Replaced with fighting the good fight with Christian. A fight that no one can even know that I participate in, so alas I keep up the facade of the shallow bastard.
Maybe it’s time for ole Tobias to just step away back into the shadows and go live that life full time? Maybe I don’t have it in me anymore to compete with these guys? I mean the whole reason I wanted to get back into wrestling was for a smidgeon of my old life. That feeling I got when the crowd would pop at the sound of my music, that rush I got from competition with the absolute best in the world. The feeling of accomplishment from victory and the praise of the fans even though they “hate” me at times. Even those who don’t agree with my actions would respect me for my skills. An admiration that was tangible that I could feel instead of just the silent praise for what I do with Death. Something that I’ll never hear “good job” for because who would even believe me? What you do this weekend Tobias? Oh nothing much just foiled a plot to bring about the end of existence as we know it….oh yea I bet that goes over real well.
Poor Paradine, came back after all this time away to have a final run in the spotlight and gets tied up with me. True I gave him a title shot almost right out of the gate, however it was also like getting tied with an anchor that would only drag him down. Well, that’s not exactly new I guess, always dragged people down. It’s sort of my thing after all, maybe that’s really why none of my relationships in this business last very long. Oh well, nothing that can be done about it now. Welp...there’s the knock on the door, it must be about that time. If this is the final ride for Tobias, let’s try to make it at least a good one eh?