Caledonia Feedback Thread

This is the forum where you give show reviews for the weekly Evolution shows as well as PPVs. You can also request feedback for a specific roleplay, graphic, segment or anything of your liking for the masses to review your work.

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Caledonia
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Caledonia Feedback Thread

Post by Caledonia » Sun Jun 10, 2018 12:03 am

So, thought I’d kick up this thread anew lol. Would greatly appreciate feedback on my new piece, The Commune.
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The Weaver of Dreams
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Post by The Weaver of Dreams » Sun Jun 10, 2018 3:40 am

Following your roleplays is still like reading a thriller story, which now sees its next chapter with Cali meeting Ivy. When she recounts the story of Dan, thanks to the links to previous roleplays it gives the reader either a refresher or a full backstory of what has happened up to now, which is great to bring people up to speed, since the story has been quite deep of late.

The phone call to The Shadow is a nice touch and a reiteration of a pact that had been made months ago, but now seems to be more relevant than ever, so another thing being tied in and then I loved Eris and Cali going to the commune, it was a great flashback to the good Academy days, then the match talk was good, fit in well.

And you and your cliffhangers at ends of roleplays!!! *shakes fist* At least the resolution came right after in Omega's rp, so all good, at least this time, lol.
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Post by Pandora's Box » Mon Jun 11, 2018 12:10 am

I really liked this it was so deep and so many moving parts and I like the little details like playing candy crush lol you always leave us wanting more.
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Post by DemonOfSobriety » Tue Jun 12, 2018 2:01 pm

I wasn't going to feedback on this until results were up, but since results were going to get put up today, I think it's safe.

You are a far superior writer to me, I feel. You have a way of weaving your story lines together like a fine tapestry. Judging on this RP alone, I would say trash talk was weak. I think that is true of both of our RPs because of the fact that this match is built on the respect between Cal and the Forsaken. In this case, I think a lot of trash talk would be a negative and it was good that you recognized that. When this match is over, I expect that Dorian will be taking his first pinfall or submission if we don't get attacked by Ouroboros first. Your work, I feel, was far better than mine.
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Post by userpoets » Thu Jun 14, 2018 4:13 pm

I'm possibly biased because I wrote some of this with you but Caledonia/Eris is probably my favorite CWF duo, narrowly edging out MiAtaxia. You are a lovely storyteller, sir.

edit: Adding in the links to things that came before is a great way to handle your long and winding storyline, so additional props to that.
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Post by Caledonia » Mon Jun 18, 2018 7:02 pm

Would greatly appreciate feedback on my newest piece, Turn And Face The Strange. Will get some feedback up shortly (hopefully).
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Post by MiaRayne » Tue Jun 19, 2018 8:16 am

Cali is quickly becoming a new favorite of mine. I don't know where she's coming from and I'm still trying to learn her backstory. However, what I have seen is a strong female character that only improves over time. You have earned my attentions and all I can say is to definitely keep up this trend that you're on!
"No great mind has existed without a touch of madness..."
~<3's moonlit walks and going tit for tat with Duce Jones~
Only person to own a pinfall victory over Caledonia <3
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Post by Caledonia » Tue Jun 19, 2018 12:37 pm

MiaRayne wrote:
Tue Jun 19, 2018 8:16 am
Cali is quickly becoming a new favorite of mine. I don't know where she's coming from and I'm still trying to learn her backstory. However, what I have seen is a strong female character that only improves over time. You have earned my attentions and all I can say is to definitely keep up this trend that you're on!
Appreciate the feedback :) I’d suggest reading The Commune and clicking on all the hyperlinks, it gives a pretty good (if incomplete) sketch of Cali’s backstory (at least the parts that pertain to her current arc).
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Post by userpoets » Tue Jun 19, 2018 4:23 pm

The juxtaposition is flawless. I loved how this one paralleled the current storylines.

Wow, that was vague. Anyways, the point is that Caledonia, while struggling with how she'll punch a friend in the face to defend her title, managed to punch a friend in the face to prepare. Great allegory.
Every Generation Needs a Revolution

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Post by MiaRayne » Tue Jun 19, 2018 6:25 pm

Caledonia wrote:
Tue Jun 19, 2018 12:37 pm
MiaRayne wrote:
Tue Jun 19, 2018 8:16 am
Cali is quickly becoming a new favorite of mine. I don't know where she's coming from and I'm still trying to learn her backstory. However, what I have seen is a strong female character that only improves over time. You have earned my attentions and all I can say is to definitely keep up this trend that you're on!
Appreciate the feedback :) I’d suggest reading The Commune and clicking on all the hyperlinks, it gives a pretty good (if incomplete) sketch of Cali’s backstory (at least the parts that pertain to her current arc).
I shall do just that in the next day or so. Want to get started on writing my match, but wanted to make sure that I dropped you some back feeding in the mean time 🙂
"No great mind has existed without a touch of madness..."
~<3's moonlit walks and going tit for tat with Duce Jones~
Only person to own a pinfall victory over Caledonia <3
Semi colon.,Right Parenthesis.

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